I Think I’ve Given Up… On My Parents’


             My mom has been calling me the last few weekends attempting to visit. This weekend she was going to come up. I forgot that we had our church’s five year celebration. I called and asked her what time she  planned on coming up and she said, “whatever time you want me to.” I told her what we had going on, which was going to church and then staying for dinner and then we had a Dave Ramsey financial thing that night and that she was welcome to come to church and the dinner and she basically just told me to let her know when we weren’t busy so she could come up and see us. She sounded so down and out when I told her that. But, I tried inviting you, that’s your problem if your cult of a church and head of your household has that much control over you  that you can’t attend an actual church that is preaching God’s word.

              I feel like the church that we attend is so good. You can follow along in the bible and I have not ever heard the same thing preached on twice, which is the way it should be because the bible is a LONG book, there is plenty of different things to go over not just how you can’t cut your hair and that you have to wear dresses, or that you’re going to go to Hell for not following these rules. etc…

              I, myself have changed for the better but if my family of origin doesn’t want to change I’m not going to pretend like I’m okay with that. They ruined the first part of my life and they still think that they get to have control over me…. Well…. They don’t! I think it’s stupid that they think that they’re going to get to spend time with me and my family when they are still involved in their cult beliefs and don’t try to change in any way. They couldn’t protect or get me, their daughter, the helped that I needed when I was a child. I don’t think that they deserve to be around my daughter.

                They did this to themselves. They just thought that I was going to keep quiet and stay under their control forever. I am the normal one and they have the problem. I wish they could see that they need to fix themselves. I honestly think that they think that I have the problem, and I do have a problem….. with them…. I’m just having a hard time finding a way to tell them this in a semi-nice way. And, then again maybe I shouldn’t care. But I guess I just have respect for my parents’. And, I don’t know why I have any respect for them either… It’s  a very complicated situation that I am trying to handle in the best way possible.


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